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« Hats Off Austin Powers »



December 13th, 2005


They’re Back

by Sean Randall

Surely by now you’ve heard the latest news that John McEnroe and Martina Hingis have decided to get “back in the ring” and even Anna Kournikova has not ruled out a return herself to the game.

Johnny Mac plans on playing doubles in San Jose. At least that will be tolerable for just about everyone except the chair umpires, tournament officials and his opponents. No one wants to lose to a grey-haired 46-year-old on a tennis court. The scary part is he’ll probably win a few rounds just because the poor souls he’s playing will choke!

As for the dynamic duo of Hingis/Kournikova. Last I checked Hingis lost in three sets in her last comeback bid a while back in Jakarta (i think it was there). Now, after winning single sets in World Team Tennis over your next door neighbor’s daughter last summer, she thinks she can get back into the mix. Too bad, she’s in for a rude awakening.

Since the Swiss Miss left the game with bad feet in 2002, the top players have continued to get stronger and fitter. So I’m not sure where someone like Hingis who was never really that strong and who currently doesn’t seem to be that fit will finish. We know she’ll have plenty of new boyfriends that’s for sure, but any ranking finish within the Top 20 would be amazing.

Anna, on the other hand, couldn’t win much back when she was “in form.” Now that she’s form-less, what’s her angle on talking comeback? Did she suddenly wake up and realize that Maria Sharapova has stolen her spotlight and her endorsement money? Or has she become a better player? Either way - and you know the asnwer - it’s too late, your gig is up! You can go back to hanging out with that Emilio Estabon Iglasias guy and making soft porn music videos.

So, in conclusion, Johnny Mac: Good. Martina: Okay. Anna: Horrible.

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One Comment for “They’re Back”

Dawn Gupton Says:

I saw McEnroe play Blake in a fund raiser event
and I think he will do well playing doubles…
He just need to smile more and enjoy the game



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