"I just won a Grand Slam. The last thing I'm going to talk about is some fingers or a banana, alright? I hope you got that one, thanks."
-- The cheating Maria Sharapova when asked about being coached with signals from the stands by Michael Joyce during the US Open final.
"Those are real hard fans. There are a lot of them here. Some are a little bit crazy with their drinking their beers every once in a while. But I love it."
-- Maria Sharapova on the US Open fans.
"It's weird, because there are a couple of sides of me. There's the Maria that's a tennis player. There's the Maria that is a normal girl. And there's the Maria who's a businesswoman. And that's where the 'Maria Sharapova brand' comes into play. I've been lucky to be associated with amazing companies that have given me experience about all that."
-- Maria Sharapova.
"I can't say I don't like acting, but I can't imagine a career when I have to spend 70 percent of my time in a trailer eating Snickers bars."
-- Maria Sharapova on possible doing some acting.
"I wouldn't change a thing."
-- Maria Sharapova on what she would do if a player or tournament official asked her to tone down her orgasma-grunting.
"I'm done growing. I only grow when I put my high heels on now."
-- Maria Sharapova.
"Well I got to No. 1. That's my answer to that."
-- Maria Sharapova when asked if her modeling/self-promotion is getting in the way of her tennis.
"I know you are reporters and I know this is your job, but, you know, take your note pads, take your pencils down, take your grunt-o-meters down, the fashion police, put everything away and just watch the match, you know, from just the fans' perspective. I seriously think that the quality of the match today was great."
-- Maria Sharapova lecturing the media after losing to Justine Henin-Hardenne at the Australian Open.
"The atmosphere was very much Russian."
-- Maria Sharapova after playing her first-round match in Moscow. You would hope so.
"I'm not envious of anyone."
-- Maria Sharapova when asked if she was envious of any parts of Justine Henin-Hardenne's game after losing to the Belgian at Roland Garros.
"It's nice to be one of the most beautiful people."
-- Maria Sharapova on being named to People magazine's 50 Most Beautiful list.
"To tell you the truth, I could care less (laughing). There are other things that I'm more worried about than that."
-- Maria Sharapova on Serena and Venus Williams possibly meeting in the Miami quarterfinals, and whether fans are still interested in the sisters.
"It's called Retail Therapy."
-- Maria Sharapova on getting over her Australian Open loss to Serena Williams by going shopping.
"In reality there was a match. She must not have been in reality."
-- Maria Sharapova responding to Serena Williams saying "Actually, I don't believe I played a Wimbledon final" concerning their last meeting, which the Russian won.
"I don't care what they're selling."
-- Maria Sharapova when questioned by the L.A. Times as to whether the sexy WTA marketing campaign featuring the Russian at the WTA Championships was selling sex.
"Within a few years the name 'Maria Sharapova' will be a brand as universally recognized as Calvin Klein, BMW and Rolex."
-- Maria Sharapova (c) manager Max Eisenbud.
"Reading the newspapers, there's nothing I'm going to learn new about myself, because I know what I said, and you know, I don't need to read what I said, 'cause I know what I said. I like to look at the pictures."
-- 17-year-old Maria Sharapova on her strategy for reading the newspaper. Another argument for a college education.
"People seem to forget that Anna (Kournikova) isn't in the picture anymore. It's Maria-time now."
-- Maria Sharapova in Sports Illustrated. Maria-time, is that like Hammer-time?
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